the view from the twelfth floor…

Exactly 3 months and 6 days into my marriage and this person whom I was meeting the second time in my life, asked me if we were planning family. And mind you, she had quite a concerned look on her face when she asked me the question - and was quite loud too. I’m sure the 6 people sitting at our table must’ve heard her because suddenly everyone went quiet.

My reaction? i honestly didn’t know what to say to her. I was astounded, embarrassed, offended - all at once. I wish I had said exactly what was on my mind, but instead, I laughed and mumbled something incoherent. How do you deal with such people? She wasn’t even at the wedding and I don’t even know her.
How do some people just assume that other peoples’ lives concern them? What gives them that authority? And why the concern? why? why? why? does the question not bother them? Do such people ever consider the possibility of someone wanting to spend quality time with their significant other without having a ‘family’ (I think she used the word ’family’ instead of baby to be discreet) to add to the dynamics?

I know for a fact that the next time around I’m asked the question, I still won’t know how to respond.

 Just when I’d decided that I would think positive and not whine about my silly problems with life and the city, violence erupted in the city. I just fail to understand how things will improve if we keep burning cars, buses, and people (!). I feel like we take one step forward, and then 20 backwards. I seriously doubt the country’s evolution - whereby we should be advancing and maturing over the years. But I guess that just doesn’t happen in our case.  

Its been a while since I last updated, but these days I’m honestly not inspired to write. I don’t know what it is - maybe its the onset of summer, and the idea of those hot and sticky days just doesn’t make me happy.
I’m ready for a trip out of Karachi - even if its to Lahore or Islamabad. I feel like I need to get away. Why? I don’t know. My life couldn’t be better - happily married, a wonderful husband, a great job, etc. I think I want to blame the city, I just feel burnt out.

In other news, the trip to Seychelles was phenomenal. The beaches are gorgeous, the islands are beautiful and the view from anywhere on the island is just unbelievable. All the islands are hilly so you’re either driving uphill or downhill the entire time - and you can see the other islands across the ocean. Anyone who hasn’t been, should gooo! and if you need any suggestions on what to do, etc., ask me :) And to prove myself, here’s evidence :)

The Grand Anse beach at La Digue

The view from our hotel lobby

It’s been one week since I’ve moved to Pakistan and so far it hasn’t been TOO bad. Of course there are times when I get frustrated with the way things function here, for instance how my cell phone provider sucks, how sales people are REALLY pushy, most important of all - how no one really understands the concept of ‘personal space.’ There are quite a few things I will have to accept and get used to. I’ve been trying to take one step at a time and not look at the entire picture right away, since it is overwhelming to think that this move is permanent.

But I’m doing OK. It’s raining right now, and I’m a tad nervous about how easily the streets flood and how, as a result,  life comes to a standstill..

 I have an offer to freelance for a couple of newspapers in town. But suddenly, I feel unsure of myself and whether I can handle it and if I’m ready to dive into work just yet. But I think it’ll be good since it’ll be some sort of an income. I hate not working and I hate being dependent. So maybe freelancing is the answer, huh?

I can’t promise to be regular with the blog….but I will keep in touch via e-mail!

much love.

“Everyone underestimates their own life. Funny thing is, in the end, all our stories - your life, my life, old Hussains’s life, they’re the same. In fact, no matter where you go in the world, there is only one important story: of youth, and loss, and yearning for redemption. So we tell the same story, over and over. Just the details are different.”

[p.228]  Family Matters by Rohinton Mistry

Whenever people think of Africa, they tend to associate it with chaos, poverty, AIDS, wars and such - a phenomenon I would attribute to media sensationalism. There is a different side to Africa, a positive one; the success stories, the doctors, the writers, the culture, music and so much more. This month’s issue of Vanity Fair is historical. Bono is their first-time ever, guest editor for the issue, which talks about the negative as well as the positive about Africa. Admittedly, there is quite a lot of negative, but nonetheless the issue seems quite promising. The issue is not just about Bono and his efforts but that of about twenty people including Desmond Tutu, Bill and Melinda Gates, Iman, Madonna, Brad Pitt, Jay-Z and others.

The people at Vanity Fair have put together 20 different magazine covers especially for this issue. Here’s one of many:

I haven’t started reading it, but it does sound quite refreshing - almost like  ‘Africa 101′ or something!

i have just about a couple of weeks left till I pack up my stuff and move to Karachi, for good. My mind whirls each time I think about leaving Houston. I’ve only been here four years, but it’s home now. And I just find it hard to say good-bye to a city that I’ve learned to love fiercly over the years. I admit, when I initially moved here, I hated everything about the place. But thats changed.

Maybe one of the reasons why I’m apprehensive about the move is the unfamiliarity of it all; I don’t know Karachi as well as Houston. Change is always difficult to accept. And yes, I am scared of losing my independence. But as K often tells me, it’s all about asserting myself as an adult that will change things. Of course, my family sometimes tends to see me as the eighteen-year old that left Karachi, so it will be a bit of a challenge! 

Day before yesterday, my professor/thesis advisor was going out of town for a month and we had lunch together. And honestly, it was really hard saying bye to her. A lot harder than I thought because it left me wondering how life will be without all the amazing people that I’ve met in these four years. And thats when I realized that I will have to go through the same emotional rollercoaster with the rest of my friends when it’s time for me to leave.

I don’t regret my decision to move back, because I will be closer to family in Karachi. I just wish I didn’t have to say good-bye. It’s damn hard and I hope I won’t be an emotional wreck by the time I leave!

Here’s a pic of me and the prof. at the graduation banquet

Sorry for pulling a disappearing act once again - but I promise, I’ll be back soon.

I thought things would calm down after graduation, but it’s been quite the opposite since my mom and my mum-in-law are in town so I’ve been busy driving them places :) Not complaining, since I get to shop! It’s just the heat that’s killing me since the a/c in my car doesn’t work. And we ALL know how hot Houston summers are!

 For now I’ll leave you guys with my latest acquisition, Women and Gender in Islam. I had this book as part of the syllabus for one of my history classes and I really liked some of Leila Ahmed’s arguments. Back then I didn’t really get a chance to finish this book since I had quite a hectic schedule..

Can’t wait to begin reading it again!

p.s. feel free to comment on what you think about the book.

I’ve been trying to blog for a few days now, but after I submitted my thesis, I really didn’t want to type or be near a computer for a good few days.I am now a college graduate. I’m not quite sure what comes next but I do know I’m moving back to Karachi in a couple of months. Not really sure what will happen after i move back, but I’ve decided to take one step at a time. And trust me, a little bit of uncertainty feels good. Or maybe i feel like this just because i got done with school? Who knows…

Anyways, I digress. The highlight of my day yesterday - I won the Outstanding Thesis Award from the Honors College last night! Not to mention, the DEAN of the Honors College told my adviser that my thesis was so, so much better than everyone else’s. I’m still giddy with excitement. All the pain and torture I went through in the past three-four months finally paid off. I seriously hibernated, fell of the social radar and buried myself under a pile of books. Not to mention, the anxiety and the panic attacks I had every other day. I still can’t believe it’s finally over. For all those interested, here’s the abstract of my thesis:

“This work addresses a topic no other scholars have yet broached – the history of peoples of African descent in Pakistan. While there exists a limited body of work on the topic of African communities in modern-day India, the study of historical interactions between Africa and India – and indeed, the history of the Indian Ocean region as a unit of historical analysis – is a field that has developed only over the past decade. Chapters three through five are based on historical data gathered through actual research and fieldwork conducted during December 2006 in Karachi, Mungho Pir, and Hyderabad, Pakistan. This thesis is the first to introduce to Western audiences the fascinating history of Hosh Mohammed, an army commander in the employ of the Talpur nobles, who fought valiantly as the leader of the last Sindhi stand against the British in the Battle of Dabbo (1843). Retention of African culture and heritage, and techniques used by these peoples to assert their unique identity are also discussed. Possible avenues for future research are proposed.”

Anyways kids, I’m off to bed, will try to blog in detail later. As Garrison Keillor says, “Be well, do good work, and keep in touch.” 

They’re building a wall in Iraq to keep the Sunnis away from the Shias. Now that sounds a little too familiar, something quite like the Israeli West Bank barrier, which obviously isn’t too popular with the Palestinians. Are they not learning from past experiences at all?

Here’s an excerpt from Al-Jazeera about the ’strong’ concrete wall that’s being built in Iraq to curb violence:

“The US army and the Iraqi security services said in mid-April they had begun constructing the wall around Adhimiya to stop Sunni car-bombers leaving the area and to stop Shia death squads from getting in.

Col Farris said on Thursday that the intention of the wall was still to stop vehicle movement into and out of the area, rather than to prevent the passage of people on foot.”

Read the full text here.

The Iraqis on the other hand, are not quite sure how this will work out. Here’s an article in the Economist about their reaction about the wall.

Personally, I don’t think building physical barriers nor will re-drawing boundaries help their cause.

This reminds me of Amitav Ghosh’s “In An Antique Land,” which is about the boundary-less relationship Egypt and India shared centuries ago. It’s about the peoples of different religions that co-exist peacefully, often adopting each others cultures, and traveled back and forth between the regions without any hostility or enmity. Definitely a must-read for all - it’s just beautiful. And sad at the same time.